Sunday, April 23, 2006

Letters to Liz: An Introduction

Clearly, I am a sorry excuse for a blogger. I just went to log in and couldn’t remember my correct user name. I had to look it up. Pathetic.

And while there may well be more frequent posts from me, the pathetic theme well continues: my current plan is to post things I wrote years ago. Once upon a time, I was a frequent journaler. As I left school and ventured into the “real” world, I left it behind. I’m not sure if this was a casual event or coincidence. Maybe I’ll explore that one day. With a creepy, regression hypnotist!

Anyway, what I wrote instead were terribly long letters to my childhood best friend. Cleverly, I typed these on the computer so that I would look industrious - I was working as a legal secretary and generally bored out of my mind. One day it occurred to me that these letters had become my substitute for journaling, and I started printing these out. I’d completely forgotten about them until I discovered them during my recent move.

Reading them was surreal. I was bored enough to be ridiculously detailed about my life, so these letters provide a shiny, clean window into my past, far more than my failing memory can provide. I got the idea to type them up as a nostalgic archival task; I’m lucky to still have these since not losing things is hardly a strength of mine. Then I got the idea to “archive” them in my blog. I then dismissed it as entirely too self indulgent. But a wise friend of mine pointed out that blogging is, by definition completely self-indulgent. So, I figured what the hell.

For some reference, I’d just moved to Pittsburgh - for love. It wasn’t such a good decision, though it was a wonderful time in many ways. I was there for almost a year, immediately before I went to grad school. This was the second time, of three, that I broke up with Matt. The karmic burden I bear for breaking his heart three times over the course of a decade ensures it will be a couple more lifetimes before I find love. Heh. Liz had just moved to Portland, OR (she was always, and still is, much cooler than I am) with her boyfriend Mark.

Also? I'm so young and immature and just overly obsessed by inconsequential things. There's not a small amount of self-involvement, too. It was a happy relief to see that (while still very flawed and myriad & inventive ways), I'm have progressed somewhat in my life. If nothing else, I have much more perspective and am not as easily bothered by silly minutiae or that which I cannot control.

Liz remains my soulmate and best friend. In fact, she’s visiting and sitting across the room from me as I force her to watch Firefly. Given my dictatorial ways around books, movies and TV, and the excruciatingly long letters I once subjected her to, it’s a wonder we are still friends.

But, without further ado, Letters to Liz.


Blogger Diane Kristine said...

Yay, at least we get Britomusings, even if they are old. Old like you.

And wait ... am *I* the wise and self-absorbed friend? :: fingers crossed ::

12:54 AM  

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